Life Lately: December 2025 & Yearly Reflections

As I type this, there are 2 days left in December 2025. To say this year has changed me would be the understatement of the century. Grieving my dad and grandpa has changed who I am at my core. The day my dad died, that version of myself, the self I was when he was alive, died with him. I am still getting used to this new life, this new “normal.” Needless to say, this holiday season was very different for my family and me, and I made a point to rest and spend as much time with the people who are most important to me as I had the energy for.

I am looking forward to the fresh feeling a New Year brings, but at the same time, I am dreading starting a calendar year that my dad will not be alive a single day for. I apologize if this intro isn’t the most happy and most positive, but putting on a happy face would be disingenuous. Here is what we got up to in December, a yearly recap, and a few reflections to round out 2025!

Celebrating birthdays

I actually have quite a few birthdays that come up at the end of November and into December. I went over to my friend Kristine’s place to celebrate her birthday. Our other friend Nicole was there and we had brunch and a fun few hours of catching up and chatting. It’s always such a wonderful time getting together with these two. We’ve been friends since high school and our friendship is so special.

Our friend’s son, Jay, turned 6 this December. I can’t believe how fast time flies because we remember when he was born! For his party, we headed to the local community center for an afternoon of dodgeball. It was so fun seeing the kids run around and turned out to be a great workout too!

Visiting Timbo

My cousin Tim went on a trip to Australia and when he got back, Jake and I went down to his place for a visit. We hung out for a while and then went out to dinner at a local Irish Pub! It was so nice catching up, and I was able to give him a few of my dad’s baseball hats as well!

Cookie Baking

My friend Mishell came over one afternoon after I got off work with her two sons, and we baked cookies, made Rice Krispy Treats, and had a catch-up. Her partner, our friend Nich, came by after work, and we all had dinner together. We also went and hung out the following Friday while they celebrated Christmas early, as her oldest son was leaving on a trip to spend Christmas and New Year’s with his dad. Being around friends this year is one of the only things that kept me from becoming a full-on recluse.

Friend Christmas Party

Speaking of friends, we hosted a Christmas party for a few of our friends. Instead of having a formal meal, I asked everyone to bring their favorite Christmas appetizers. I made baked brie, spiced nuts, glazed meatballs, bacon-wrapped dates, and bacon-wrapped cocktail sausages. It was a fun evening playing games, watching some Christmas movies, and spending time together.

Spending time with my bestie

My best friend, Amy, moved to Portland in 2024, but she has been there for me so much this year. She calls and checks in, which is so appreciated more than she’ll ever know. She invited us to her extended family Christmas party in the middle of the month, which was so kind. She and her partner drove up and stayed with us for the weekend, and then we all went to the party together. Afterwards, we went to a beautiful lookout in Queen Anne, where you can see the whole city.

She also invited us to Christmas Eve at her parents’ house. Amy and her parents were our neighbors since she and I were 5 years old, and they were good friends with my dad! It was a nice chilled evening playing games and eating Chinese food.

Christmas Day

On Christmas morning, my brother and his partner, Jake, and I all went down to my mom’s for breakfast and presents. It is a tradition for us to do Christmas breakfast since we were kids. Then, we had a very chill rest of the day. My brother and his partner brought over a bunch of snacks, and then I made a bunch of chocolate chip cookies. We watched Christmas movies and played a new card game that my brother got for Christmas. It was a difficult day without my dad, but I was happy to spend time with my mom, brother, and Jake.

A Trip to Oregon

The day after Christmas, Jake and I left for a trip down to Oregon. On Friday, we met up with Jake’s family in Salem, OR for an afternoon of bowling. Afterward, we went for a riverfront walk and then out to dinner. We ended the evening at a bar where Jake’s cousin’s friend was doing a DJ set.

The next morning, we set off over the mountains to Jake’s hometown of Redmond, OR, to hang out with his friend Josh. We met up for Lunch and then hung out with him and another friend, making art at her house. We ended the night at our hotel pool and hot tub!

The next day, we met up with Jake’s cousin in Bend, OR, for a lovely riverfront walk and lunch. After lunch, we went back to her place for an afternoon of playing a board game called Carcassonne and catching up. We then met Josh for dinner at a local pizza place and called it an early night, so Jake and I could head home early today. It was such a great trip, and I think we might make it a tradition to do an Oregon road trip every year after Christmas going forward.

Highlights from 2025 by month

January

In January, Jake’s friend Randy came to stay, and we went to a blacksmithing class with him and Calvin and then to a dim sum lunch. We hung out with our friends who had a small baby, and I caught up with my college friends over a video call. I made my first trip to the plant nursery of the year and got back into blogging and posting on YouTube. And Jake and I spent a lot of quality time together. I was also in full-on garden planning mode!

February

In February, we had some snow days and visited the Fauntelroy Troll. I started learning how to make sourdough and, unfortunately, had some health issues that luckily went away towards the end of the month. I got my first seeds started indoors, and the garden started waking up!

March

In March, we had Amy and her partner stay with us, celebrated my mom’s birthday, and watched a total lunar eclipse. I visited my grandpa with my dad and my brother because we found out his cancer diagnosis would be fatal. We went out in Seattle to celebrate a birthday and then went bowling with our friend Kevin. I got seeds started and direct-sowed my first seeds in the ground.

April/May

In April, we lost my grandpa on the 4th and then unexpectedly lost my dad on the 16th. The rest of April and May was a blur. We had a joint memorial service at the beginning of May. I also attended my 20-year High School Reunion.

June

In June, I went to the Point Defiance Flower and Garden show, out to lunch with my old co-workers, and went on a girls trip to the Oregon coast with two of my high school friends. We celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary and survived Father’s day.

July

In July, we celebrated 4th of July with my dad’s friend Margie, floated the Cedar River, had a picnic and pool day, went to a BBQ with some of Jake’s old co-workers, went on a date night out in Fremont, and hosted friends for breakfast.

August

In August, we went to our friend’s annual neighborhood block party, attended the South Lake Union block party, and went on a road trip to the Oregon coast. We also went swimming at Shadow Lake with my dad’s friend Margie, celebrated birthdays with our neighbors, and down in Olympia with some other friends, and spread some of my dad’s ashes up at his huckleberry picking spot.

September

In September, we celebrated our dad and Uncle Tony’s birthdays with our cousin. Jake and I attended the Offspring concert, R-Day festival, and went to an escape room with some friends. We also had a video game night with my brother and his friend Amanda, celebrated our friend’s son’s first birthday, did the Puyallup, went and explored a local historic homestead, had a few game nights with our neighbors, went to play cards with Kristine and her mom, had a movie afternoon catch up with Nicole, and started decorating for Halloween.

October

In October, we went with friends up to Concrete, WA to see the salmon run at our friend Nich’s parent’s property, and celebrated Jake’s birthday, went to a Seattle Reign game and then out for drinks, and played Pickleball and had dinner with some other friends. I went to a Halloween get-together at a friend’s house, and we had our annual pumpkin carving party, and I completed another Blogtober!

November

In November, we went out to dinner and a movie with one of Jake’s hometown friends, foraged for chantrelle mushrooms, went to open mic at Tacoma Comedy club, attended a charity fundraiser at the Muckelshoot casino, had dinner at our neighbor’s house, and hosted a small group for Thanksgiving.

2025 Reflections

In 2025, an old version of my died in April with my dad. Since then I have been struggling with my grief and trying to learn more about this new version of myself. The version who now has to face the rest of her life without her dad. Grief has been exhausting, but I have really leaned into my close friendships this year and spent lots of quality time with my husband, and I know this is what has saved me. Spending time with the people closest to me is what makes life worth living, and I want more living in the coming year.

The garden continues to be my sanctuary and a place where I feel closest to my dad. My heart aches for him every day, and sometimes it’s like my brain hasn’t caught up to reality because all I want to do is share with him what I’m growing and doing out there. The void he left still feels as vast and overwhelming as it did the second I found out he had died, and somehow I am learning how to survive life without him one day at a time.

I saw a post recently that said “This year I learned that grief and gratitude can coexist” and if that hasn’t been the theme for this year then I don’t know what is. I am so grateful for my close relationships while also grieving the loss of my dad so deeply that I don’t know if I will ever be 100% again. There has been guilt too, feeling guilty for not being fully present for people, feeling guilty for celebrating things without my dad, feeling guilty for laughing and then also feeling guilty for crying. It’s this constant chaos of emotion and it’s something I’m working on in therapy and will continue to work on in the coming year.

I am grateful to have survived this year and if I am honest…I am glad it’s over.

In the Garden…

The garden is put to bed currently. I have planted garlic for the first time thoguht and it has sprouted! I’ve also spent a lot of time planting bulbs that will hopefully sprout up come Spring!